How can you love someone you have never met?
How can you wake up thinking of someone who has never woken next to you, who has never been in your arms, who has never been part of your reality?
I wake thinking of your smile, your voice, your soft accent. I think of you in quiet moments, in between thoughts, tasks. I daydream about possibilities.
I miss you if I don’t see you, even though I’ve never seen you. I worry about you, care about you, care for you.
You are the person I see when I imagine a future, at least right now, but I don’t truly know you. Maybe we will meet and fall into each other, discover that we are each other’s future. Maybe we will meet and discover that what drew us (drew me) in is virtual, not real, that we are still strangers.
For now, I will imagine, I will daydream, I will get on a plane and take the chance that daydreams can move to reality.
I miss you and want you.
I care about you, as much as you are still virtual to me, deeply.
The distance, it’s more than space; your life is filled with men like me, men who love from afar, who desire you — it’s hard for me to fathom that you don’t know me the way I know you, but at the same time, I know that every day I stare into those eyes, you see text on the bottom of a screen, mixed with hundreds of others. So, I know you, I hear your stories, your voice, see your eyes, see the way you move, the way you laugh, and that connection builds in me.
I am certain, determined, to see if I can move beyond that point (if you are willing). This time I will show up, not let anything stop me. I will see if our arms fit around each other, if the desire to kiss soft lips is there in person, in the flesh. If it is shared, because my desire is not enough alone.
If it is not, the virtual doesn’t match the reality in desire or shape, I will always be grateful to call you a friend, and you have that much of me forevermore — but I will act as if that possibility doesn’t exist when it comes to moving towards you, I will act on the basis that we will have a love story, a tale of passion, until the moment that path is set